When Bus Drivers Attack

Bus driver violence, now that’s not something you read about everyday. However, I witnessed it about 7:54 AM on the Route 10. Here’s the scenerio…

 Crazy-Creepy Dude (CCD) boards the bus. (I’ll post more about CCD later.) Today he selects yet another bus stop to make his entrance. What he didn’t know was that Regular Driver was in absentia, but CCD walks past the new driver anyway. His normal M.O. is to find a seat, dig through his strange configuration of belongings, and eventually pay the fare or swipe his card. He carries a bunch of stuff, so the excavation takes awhile.

Since New Driver was working the route and not familiar with CCD, the bus doesn’t move and the driver turns into Princess Leia in Tiny Swimsuit Jabba. She yells, “Sir! The fare is $1.50!” CCD, still digging, seems completely oblivious to Jabba’s rants. I almost expected her to throw him from the bus. Time seemed to stand still. Finally, he finds his card and swipes it. Instantly, Jabba Driver berates CCD about the rules of riding the bus.

1. Enter bus.
2. Pay fare or swipe card.
3. Do not pass white line before completing #2.
4. Find seat.

I’m not going to condone CCD’s behavior, especially since I think Regular Driver is a little relaxed with him. However, Jabba Driver was already 10 minutes late picking me up and after the CCD escapade was 15 minutes late overall. When you have a busload of people trying to make it to work and school on time, there is no time to lash out and delay the process further.

To add further insult to this already strange bus ride, an elderly woman, who probably weighed 85 pounds dripping wet, boarded the bus. She followed the proper bus entering etiquette. Before she could sit down, Jabba Driver takes off making the elderly woman fall…luckily, the elderly woman was close to a metal pole that broke her fall. She’ll probably have a substantial bruise on her arm and maybe her back. This poor woman, dressed so nicely, just wanted to make it safely to work…and bless her for still working!

Jabba Driver, check yourself before you wreck yourself…or the bus!

Miss Manners

My momma raised me to have manners. Dictionary.com defines manners as “the prevailing customs, ways of living, and habits of a people, class, period, etc.; mores.” The longer I live, the longer I have realize that we don’t really teach or require manners in our current society.

Growing up, I couldn’t leave the house without my mom saying, “Remember your pleases and thank yous!” By the time I was eighteen, I had heard this phrase so often that I would recite it along with her. It was her mantra for her children and it has become my mantra through life.

When I leave a voice mail, respond to an email, or am engaged in general conversation, I use “please” and “thank you” as often as I can and when appropriate. I know that with overuse, they become ineffective. However, I’ve discovered that some people do not have these words in their vocabulary.

For example, this morning while riding the bus into work, a gruff looking man switched seats by saying to an equally gruff looking woman, “Move over!” My first thought was, “I hope they know each other.” Apparently, as they exited the bus together, they did know each other; but the fact remains, there was neither a please nor a thank you in his imperative statement. On a somewhat crowded bus, this stands out.

People. They make me scratch my head and wonder.

Grammarians unite!

I must confess, I am a complete grammar geek. I love talking about grammar. I love picking apart sentences. Mostly, I love relating English grammar to foreign language grammar. Who can deny the lure of a gerund?

Tonight I sat in White Castle, munching my mini fish sandwiches, and discussed subjunctive mood verbs with a friend. But the discussion didn’t finish with subjunctive, I further confused my friend with a discussion of other verb moods, namely indicative and imperative. I also taught him the love of parsing a verb. This stuff gives me chills.

If you can conjugate verbs in Spanish, German, Latin, English, or another language, then join me. Grammarians of the world, unite! (How’s that for a conditional sentence followed by an imperative statement?)